What Love Is This

Honduras June 26, 2014,

 

As I am settling into my new home I can’t help but pinch myself. It all seems so unreal. I find myself waking up and forgetting where I am, as if I haven’t even made the move to another place, let alone another country. My emotions seem to be somewhat everywhere but not everywhere at the same time. I’m not fearful, I haven’t had the overwhelming sense of longing for my life in the states, all I truly am missing is the food, which that in and of itself should tell you something lol. But I digress. I actually have complete peace, which I shouldn’t be surprised by like I am, if God has called us to anything in life and we follow His will of course we should have complete peace. It’s funny and sad how we fail to truly trust God even when it comes to our emotions. I knew I was following God’s will by moving to Honduras, but I thought I would be homesick everyday or scared, or just having an overall rough time in general. The thing is though, that isn’t our Father, He doesn’t call us to something for us to be utterly miserable, yes there will be hard times I don’t want to discount that, but He truly does have our best interest in mind all the while bringing glory to His name. How little we fail to see how loving and caring God is. We more or less just say, ‘Yes, God I will follow, I will make this sacrifice, etc.’, and God is sitting there probably somewhat sad or hurt that we think He won’t give us peace or joy in any season He calls us. We think we are being punished or making this huge sacrifice for Him, when He really is blessing us. I am finding out more and more how selfish my thinking really is and just how unconditional, God’s unconditional love is for me.